memories

i am sorry.

2012-01-15T03:19:00.000-08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aarRZwT7Gs&feature=related

2011-05-11T10:55:00.000-07:00

He was poor and had no shoes,

he thought life a nasty cheat,

until one day when he met

a fellow who had no feet.

* we need to look beyond what we think.. many a times, we grow oblivious to our own weaknesses and only thinking of our self interest.

2011-04-21T09:55:00.001-07:00

you will never reconcile the violence in my heart.
you will never satisfy the undisclosed desires in my heart.
i will never be the one.

2011-04-14T17:46:00.000-07:00

why think about it night & day?
why think about it night & day?
why think about it night & day?
i wish i wash off my memory.

i am superpowerpuff.

bunny in a bunny suit

2011-03-02T19:11:00.001-08:00

pretending to be myself again

acting as if I was who I am

wearing the clothes that I always wear

and doing the usual thing to my hair

pretending to be myself again

imitating the person I've always been

legally changing my name to my name

and making believe I'm exactly the same

a bunny in a bunny suit

tiger in a tiger mask

who in the world do you think that I am

I suppose it depends on who you ask

of all the disguises I've ever worn

I flatter myself in the most sincere form

still I'm kept at a distance by friends

for just pretending to be myself again

a bunny in a bunny suit

vampire with plastic teeth

who in the world do I think that I am

I guess it depends on who I believe

stereo love

2011-03-02T07:44:00.001-08:00

When you're gonna stop breaking my heart
I don't wanna be another one
Paying for the things I never done
Don't let go,
Don't let go
To my love.

Can I get to your soul?
Can you get to my thought?
Can we promise we won't let go?
All the things that I need
All the things that you need
You can make it feel so real.

Cuz you can't deny
You've blown my mind
When I touch your body
I feel I'm loosing control
Cuz you can't deny
You've blown my mind
When I see you baby
I just don't wanna let go.

I hate to see you cry
Your smile is a beautiful lie
I hate to see you cry
My love is dying inside

I can fix all those lies
Oh baby, baby I run, but I'm running to you
You won't see me cry, I'm hiding inside
My heart is in pain but I'm smiling for you

why do we have feelings?

2011-02-25T08:46:00.000-08:00

they are nothing but just

stupid feelings.
stupid thoughts and stupid feelings.
i don't care.

i feel less miserable not bothering.
that's why. it hurts, but it doesn't matter.
to each has his own, interests.

给我一首歌的时间

2011-02-24T00:51:00.000-08:00

就算这次做错也只是怕错过
在一起叫梦分开了叫痛
是不是说没有做完的梦最痛

迷路的后果
我能承受
这最后的出口
在爱过了才有

能不能给我一首歌的时间
紧紧的把那拥抱变成永远
在我的怀里你
不用害怕失眠
如果你想忘记我也能失忆

能不能给我一首歌的时间
把故事听到最后才说再见
你送我的眼泪
让它留在雨天
如果你怀疑一心的依然勇气
当作鄙夷

2011-01-30T19:01:00.000-08:00

i am okay i am okay i am okay i am okay i am okay.

iamokay.
iamawesome.
nothingcanmakemefeelotherwise.
nobodycan.

2011-01-14T18:02:00.000-08:00

part of me knows i want to hold on to this forever.
part of me says not to hold my faith too high so i don't get hurt.

2011-01-09T04:56:00.001-08:00

i made a fool out of myself.

2011-01-09T04:16:00.000-08:00

dear diary,

have you ever felt upset?
not cause you didn't win a game.
but that you lost some broken reliance.

have you ever felt upset?
not cause you lost a pillar,
but the balance of the pillar.

have you ever felt upset?
which is worse?
not having something or having it broken?

how did we get here
when i thought i know you so well.
when i thought you know me so well.
i realise i'm wrong.

am i upset for being accused of getting upset for a wrong reason?
it became a totally different reason before and after.

maybe i haven't changed at all.
sorry trust haven't been my best subject.
that my heart sank when you said that.
you don't know me afterall.

i was used to walking on ice alone.
it was so much easier when it was easy to steer clear of anyone.
now that i let my guts down a little and slipped.
it hurts more than i imagined.

so long

2010-12-29T04:24:00.000-08:00

hi diary.
it must have been long and quiet.
just thought i dust off some cobwebs here and jot some of my little feelings here. just me and you.
now it's just us, no more the 17 year old girl five years ago.

i went back to king albert park macdonalds that day.
i looked around, my mind overwhelmed with pieces of flashbacks. mostly good, mostly wonderful, well a tiny bit of bitter accompanied though.

i thought of A and cringed a little. you know diary, they always say we have to learn to let things go, to be happier. i did try, just that there are still times when i sit alone and let my mind wander a little too far away, and what comes to mind always stops at places that i was a little more of a letdown- to myself, most importantly to people and things that i was once passionate in. far too many. they call it, life. i hate myself for the numerous times that i let my heart sink too deep. it shouldn't be like that.

it shouldn't be like that.

one day i'll fly away

2010-04-25T05:40:00.000-07:00

I follow the night
Can't stand the light
When will I begin
To live again?

One day I'll fly away
Leave all this to yesterday
What more could your Love do for me?
When will Love be through with me?

Why live life from dream to dream?
And dread the day when dreaming ends

One day I'll fly away
Leave all this to yesterday
Why live life from dream to dream?
And dread the day when dreaming ends

One day I'll fly away
Fly, fly away

tonight

2009-12-01T05:26:00.000-08:00

i feel helpless.
everything is broken.
you know, i cannot fix everything.
some things, just left broken.
i want to leave.
how do i?

good night, my vent out space.

2009-11-13T19:38:00.000-08:00

'Our forefathers has forged close relationships based upon mutual interests & mutual respect'.

Obama, Santory 2009 Speech

It is all bout mutual interests.
Whether on a global basis,
regional basis,
national basis,
community,
groups,
individual.

how sad. every man for his own.
if i could, be a bystander, a third person.
standing at the window,
like watching a musical,
all bewildered & amused.

思念是一种很旋的东西

2009-11-13T04:49:00.000-08:00

这是人生本来就该有的刻苦明心。这次我什么都豁出去了。
青春
人生
梦想
人生
未来
人生
这次也许是人生中最重要的决定。

回头想想往日，童年的无知与年少的傲气，是我们拥有的回忆。
成长的痛苦正在前方，但我们有的是青春的辉煌，梦想的高扬，明天的希望。
未来的路会恨漫长，但人生因为有这刻苦明心而有意思。

今天的刻苦明心是明天坐在沙滩上的回忆，是后来传说的故事。

my perogative

2009-11-12T17:34:00.000-08:00

i always believed i owe any explanation only to myself.
your friends & family don't need it,
and your foes won't buy it anyway :)

any reasons why or why not or how i should or should not, had or not.
i firmly believe though, i need to explain my own actions & my future actions to myself.

i prefer much to save my breath on anyone else.

safekeep.

2009-11-07T23:42:00.000-08:00

the best things in life, are the simplest- simplest to have, and simplest to lose.

i want to have, the simplest things in life. because the simplest things are the building blocks of man's opulence.

life's journey

2009-11-07T23:01:00.000-08:00

'life is too long, if time is well-spent'

if i were to write my life as a story,
i might not be able to.
the parts of the stories not fitting into consequentials
all over the picture, incompleted picture or rather are incompleted pictures which were not going to fit anywhere to form any complete picture.
but they are not a in mess, it's just that the completed pictures are meant to be so.

i think, that's how a real life story actually is..
the bibligraphies of many famous people of sorts basically falls under the category of 'semi fiction'; details put forth & written well to form a complete & well-told life story.

wonder. i tried to ponder many a time, about my life.
& they all fall grey. parts & pieces of them.
not the melancholy grey, i am certain i am no pessimist, just a skeptic. and sometimes skeptic bout being skeptic.

realise. that in (my)life, there is no
exactly
precisely
definitely
indefinitely

i speak, yet hold my reservations about philosophy, ideals, utopia, love, relationships, people.
that explains my pieces of grey.

*to continue sometime*

心动 - 林晓培

2009-11-01T03:55:00.000-08:00

有多久没见你以为你在那里
原来就住在我心底陪伴着我的呼吸
有多远的距离以为闻不到你的气息
谁知道你背影这么长回头就看到你

过去让它过去来不及
从头喜欢你白云缠绕着蓝天
如果不能够永远走在一起
也至少给我们怀念的勇气拥抱的权利
好让你明白我心动的痕迹

总是想再见你还试着打探你消息
原来你就住在我的身体守护我的回忆

i am but without a heart.

2009-11-01T02:48:00.000-08:00

i suspect my brain is the pumping source of my life, not my heart.

so if there is a term 'brain death' referring to a living person with incapacity of brain-function.

i am in the condition of 'heart death'.

2008-03-26T08:59:00.000-07:00

isn't it too late to treasure after you lost something?

something more important than everything else.

and then why do you only realise after you lose it?
----------------------------------------------------------

only then you regret your lifetime this only something.

2008-03-18T09:29:00.000-07:00

i have learnt.

meanwhile, i'll flee across the time space.

look forward, not back.

till i can do that.

goodbye to love

2008-01-20T02:47:00.000-08:00

i just wanna keep this url for myself :)

beipan - iloveen